3 months

When I went to italy that year and I watched john go on the plane back home, I knew something new was going to happen. I could feel it in my bones. I was watching couples happy and content, holding hands and talking of wonderful times and memories they had had and their time spent here. “Were suppose to be engaged, getting married soon, and all we can do is fight about everything. Maybe we need some time apart. I want us to get married in a joyful mindset not as an obligation that we give into just because it’s the right thing to do. To me, our hearts have to be ready for it, wanting it and longing for it, and so happy in that and that is not how I feel. It’s like were forcing it and not forgiving each other. I know I’m holding onto the past, and not allowing my heart to love you” “Are you calling off the wedding? I mean, why are you complaining and talking about our engagement like it were some dead thing in the past that you don’t want to procede with?" “Because it does feel dead. From you leaving me with Michelle, trying to cover up all of that and walking into it blindly is to me not a good idea, you know? You guys left me and now I’m scarred for life and I don’t know how to get over it. I think maybe some time apart, not thinking about our engagement, marriage and relationship would help me. I’M NOT GIVING UP ON IT HONEY, IM JUST SAYING GIVE IT A FEW MONTHS.” “Okay but don’t give up on us, I love you and you are my fiancé. I want to be with you forever.” “Definitely honey. You too are still my love. I would never give up on us. You are not like other men before you. Yes, maybe I will always be sort of a wanderer but I will never give up on us. Listen, Dan and Joshua don’t compare to you. I had so much trouble with them, but when we have trouble, I surprisingly never leave you. You can call me names, talk about my weaknesses, never listen to me, always test me and I love you so much, these things always bring me back to you and harder than ever. I don’t want you to worry about us, I just want some space for a while. Going on this trip was suppose to bring us closer like we needed something like this because maybe we weren’t spending enough time together, enough at home but I feel like it has drawn us apart. So what I think I need is time away just like you did with Michelle in your own way! I’m not bringing that up to be a pest, to annoy the heck out of you. I want you to go home, spend time with your family, friends, and give me a few months? “Okay honey, I trust you and I hope we can be together again soon. Remember, our love will never fade, it is too strong for that!”