friends to enemies

So my husband now had totally disappointed me with all the women that I got to know. As you can see I have no problem with making friends, and THINGS ARE NOT LIKE THEY WERE IN HIGH SCHOOL. I had made tons of friends. And I did not get why they all disappeared on me. There must have been like 5-7 friends totally deserted me when I confronted some and when they found out my husband was single, at the time. At the time this happened, I was so excited to enter a place like Edmonton, I had always dreamed of a place where I could go out with friends, no parents around and go shopping. Because we were still not seeing each other, he was contacting these women and as a result because they saw themselves with him, they totally did not see themselves as friends anymore. Of course I would get jealous of them, he was and is still as a married woman, a dream for me! I was so mad about this at both parties! I had good intentions with making friends, I was even willing to make that place my home, because for a while, I was LOVING the interactions with friends while hanging out at different restaurants, bars and coffee shops. My husband basically took away all that fun stuff from me by his flirting with my friends. He always says he is simply trying to be friendly, while SERIOUSLY making these women fall for him. They were basically saying, “PICK ME” while I am sitting over wondering, what the HECK do you want?? Turns out I am wrong and they do not matter to him when I confronted his sister about this. I messaged her on facebook!! She seemed to claim that he did not have any interest in these women at all, that he’s not that kind of person, to have the intention to flirt! I have ALWAYS been friends with John’s sister, she is truly awesome. That conversation put me in the greatest of spirits because there’s nothing like your crush leaving a woman and discouraging those women from thinking they even have a chance with him. Love my babe!! Muah! So I ran to Dan to keep myself from getting too upset at John. I mean, what did he expect, that I would just sit at home, doing nothing while my crush is spending quality time with Sandra?? I had had so many problems with friends and Jon for that matter, Dan seemed to be the remedy for all my failures! Dan and I went on a pizza date one night, we also went to this bar where we just sat as a couple and we can’t forget our cross-country skiing date, which ended up very badly. My idea of that kind of skiing was that it would be along flat trails and let’s just say we left ten minutes from starting the very curvy trails. I also mentioned that we met at another bar. Times with Dan were seriously the best!

The Angie Log

Angie was Sarah’s closest friend during the time that John was away with Sandra. We did everything together (except when going to school.) When we first met we were in a school classroom, when she walked up to me at first. We went to see the movie “Knocked up” which wa so funny and our friendship would make it so far as to see “Avatar.” I believe the latter had more of an effect on me. I mean the relationship John and I had reminded me of the young avatar couple that the movie was displaying to us as the audience. They reminded me of our connection and passion for each other. The girl avatar acted a lot like me, it’s hard to trust, has a slight temper when things don’t go my way, strong, smart, and daring and adventurous. Anyway, Angie and I had a lot of fun times. I just didn’t know if I could trust her. From the beginning of knowing her, she has this friend Lawrence. She warned me of him, that he’s not a good guy and someone who took advantage of her. I don’t know though, I did not think he was a bad guy, so he called me up one day and he came over. He also invited me to his place one night, it was just a friendly meeting, and that’s what happened at my place. We sat with a space between us, he admitted later that we never did anything intimate (which made me so proud of him when he could have taken advantage of me.) Anyway, we sat by the fireplace that was downstairs in a separate, enclosed room, my room was also on that floor. We had a few laughs and talks and finally called it quits as it was “Getting late” as he said. He was a responsible, calm and collected guy that knows what he wants. He is a guy that would try to interact with me in a more than friends kind of way but that’s ok because I was careful not to do anything that would upset Ang and make her feel inferior in any way! Angie was always trying to set me up with someone, but I always said “no” because there was John. I couldn’t do that to him. “He’s my backbone, my all, my reason for living, why would I entertain my time with someone else when hes coming back for me.” “I know,” she said back, “how do you know he’s coming back!” “Because we talked about that, they’re only going to be gone a little while and then we are going to reunite” “oh ok,” Angie would never push anything on me, she was a tall and pretty girl who would never inconvenience me into doing things that I did not want. I will, to be realistic, say that she and I didn’t always get along. We had clashes unfortunately and that drew us apart eventually. It’s like she gets super mad at me and I can’t handle it so I run away from her. Writing this now, it’s been a few years since we have talked.

outline

sheryls mom gets sick and this interferes with their love life because Sheryl is planning the wedding but also making frequent visits to see her mom -this causes problems to her because she wont be as focused on the wedding emotionally -but its an opportunity to include others in its preparation (I need you here…) -A few of her friends abandon her at this time -This puts strain on john bc he is also the reason they leave -will they work out these issues and forget about these problems (that don’t matter) and focus on the wedding? After the wedding… -whats she struggling with? - after having a wedding and getting past the honeymoon stage (of their relationship), sarah -her new job – its always the outer influences that put pressure on sarah - someone at work wants the same promotion as sarah in their counselling job (this person intimidates sarah) -her husband is putting on pressure to have kids, they are getting older -her husband works through these struggles with her by: putting off having a baby until work settles down, she loses some hours and gives up on the job promotion, -other social happenings is what she needs like with John’s friend Sandra. -a few conversations with her will uplift her and talk of getting out/joining social gatherings/groups will also help! Down the road, Sarah will finally achieve her ultimate goal and go on a friend’s trip -New York is where they go -she will achieve / encounter a personal victory -it should be emotional/mental -when she goes to see a bunch of shows in NY, she realizes her dream again to do that -she also knows in reality that her family and job connections will never accomodate it -in going to NY, even though she loves it, she realizes that all this wealth and privilege is not what she wants on this level -she also goes to Taiwan soon after and realizes that her country Canada has much more to offer as a developed nation, Taiwan is developing and has less to offer -she wonders what made her do it in the first place, Canada is a better option -NY will be a weekend vacation, whereas Taiwan was a way to experience the culture very well for three months

the restaurant

“Oh John, that is so special.  From the moment we met, you were my dream, everything I ever wanted, honey,” I said.

“Its hard to believe that we met when we were teenagers and I have this fondness for you, a genuine sense of you being yourself and me being myself as well.  I think the seed was planted there of our germination, of our spring of love.  The always
“Hi, sarah” is greeted with great love, happiness and wanting of each other.  Do you see what I mean? We have always been there for each other and longed to be in each other’s arms.  That’s what that shows me!” John said.

“Wow”, I say. “Me too, whenever I see you, I always feel that I desire, and want you in my life.  I have never felt that for anyone else in my life.  People always say (I know and believe): that they have never felt this before and I used to think that was so corny but now that this is happening to us, I believe in that kind of love; You are saying: I love you even though ive never seen it or experienced it before.  It is a kind of love which is something you've never seen, that sees beyond what’s there, there as in no love ; because you are believing that despite what has happened before, you are in a real love situation.  You are believing that that love now and forever is real.  So I say yes, I love you deeply!"

“That’s beautiful, you have basically explained to me everything I’ve been feeling in my heart. I love you and always will.

“Always honey, when ever we came in contact I was thrilled to see you.”

“Thrilled baby, thrilled as in sky diving thrilled, so you’re skydiving whilst my heart is going through these heights of emotion.”

“Oh no honey I don’t mean it like that, I was very excited I should say then…”

“just joking babe, take a joke!!!”

“I know, I know, im testing you…Oh right were not doing that anymore”

He picks me up and put me over his shoulders and says, “You did what, what did you do??”

“Never mind husband, I’m yours now forever”

“That sure shut you up baby!!!

I wiggle my body trying to get down from there and put him off balance.

It doesn’t work every time!

So as we left the property that we were on at the restaurant, arms locked together on our backs I could remember passing this way many times. I was just thinking how our love was so special now and when I used to pass this italian restaurant on the whyte avenue strip. 

“You know, when we did part ways that day at chapters, what do you think was going through my mind?”

“what time was this honey?”

“when you left with Sandra.”

“Probably that I’m going to kick me in the shins, then I’d never be able to play ultimate again!”

“No not in the least. I had forgiven you. I wanted you, loved you, and I wanted you to stay.”

date night

So we were off to eat something after Amy and I were talking and m husband was getting hungry so we went to the italian restaurant right across from chapters on whyte avenue.  Of course I love either straight spaghetti but also like the cream carbonara sauce pasta dish so that is what I ordered.  But something peculiar was coming up.  I noticed this guy just staring at me and I couldn’t figure out why.  So I kept looking away.  My husband just kept saying “whats wrong honey?” as I was careful not to point at him to draw any attention to me.  I whispered, “ya. Honey, there’s someone looking straight at me and I can not figure out why! “Oh my gosh,” I thought, “that’s my friend Rex”  But to be honest, I did not really want to talk to him!  My husband was with me and it had been so many year, that walking up to him would be so awkward.  The other thing I was thinking of was that my ex boyfriend walked into Chapters the other day, with his wife and never breathed a word so I decided I would do the same.  Man, today I am running into so many situations, it seems like eating supper with John is not going to happen.  Anyways, we finally sit down and order our meals and we start talking.

“Honey, I have something important to tell you.” said John.

“ok honey whats up?”

“Sandra is moving on and getting married”

“Oh my gosh that is so great I said, I’m so happy for her”

“Where is he from, does she have to relocate”

“No they met here”

“Do you feel relieved?”

“yees well theres always that fear in the back of your mind that your ex girlfriend will want you back…!”

“Oh Sarah, how many times have I told you I would never do that”

“I know, it’s just a little insecurity I have.  When was with one of my exes, there was always this girl lingering around us.  This girl really had no respect some days she didn’t even acknowledge me. “

“It’s ok though, I know who I am and what I deserve so I’m glad she’s officially moving on.” 

“Don’t worry Sarah, she does not mean any harm to you at all, she wants to see us happy and supports what we have together.”

“Were lucky that way, hey, to have a friend that looks out for us, supports us and is always there! I kinda like that about her.”

“Believe me, honey, you wont be disappointed because I will never let you down.  I’ve made my commitment to you known by my friends and family.  They know I love you and will always be with you and nothing can some between us.  If there is a problem between any of us, I will always make you happy and you will always be first in my life.  That’s how much I love you so much.

Aunts

And the wedding carried on.  We had our cordon bleu meal, salads and potatoes, there were lots of punch and bread where guests could help themselves.  “This is such a great wedding and banquet, Sarah” said my Aunt, as I reached the refreshments table. I knew her from living with her family when I was little.  She may be the Aunt I like the most.  She’s always positive and not as socially awkward, a very happy person.  “Oh, yes thank you Aunt, I am very pleased with it.  It has taken a lot of energy and work, but of course my special day is so important to me.  When youre getting married, you want everything to be perfect, It’s just a pattern women get into, you know, not only because its your special day but you want everything to look perfect for your guests to enjoy it as well, you know” I said to her.

“the little flower girls, your sisters two children, did such a great job, that was cute when one of the girls dropped her flowers and the older girl helped her up as her big sister,” said my Aunt

“yup, those are my niecies and they are so cute.  Proud Aunty over here.”

“my favourite part so far has been seeing all the kids together here, my inner teacher values coming out here.  I love all the dancing! No regrets there.  It’s so special seeing mommies and daddies dancing with their children.  It shows such a creative and thoughtful relationship between children and adult.  We are so fortunate to have so many children in our family.”

She goes on, “I am very happy that you two chose each other to marry because it always sounded like you had a fondness for each other.  It just needed time to develop.  I hope you will learn to love another and forgive each other even with all that’s happened.”

 

“Oh yes, Aunt, we are really forgiving and loving towards each other.  Any space between us, we are very eager it work it out.  It’s not like other relationships where you don’t talk for like two days.  At least I hope it doesn’t amount to that.  This is definitely what I love about him.  He is very forgiving and always is the done seeking peace and love, and also his faithfulness, he is so dedicated and concerned about my wellbeing.  He’s strong too.  But I have had to learn how to be patient, forgiving and loving.  I feel like this part of our relationship needs work and I could get better at It, it doesn’t come easy for me.  I hold to things I shouldn’t, but tis a progress that just keeps getting better with time.” 

“Don’t worry, Sarah, every relationship goes through this.  And you’re blessed you have those things with him.  Some couples take years to get that far.  I think your separation in your early days probably helped with that development.  I know you are going to do well together!  You both are a great team, your compliment each other and you are ready for life together!  I love you both!” said Aunt.

 

 

 

 

speeches

Now we got to the banquet hall with everything set up, tables and chairs looking so good.  (I don’t really know where the speeches come in and I think it’s after the meal).  With the decorations on the tables and chairs,  the white lights lit all over the room, in the corners and around the walls, the room ;looked spectacular, just the way I wanted it!  As the guests started arriving at the banquet hall, the head table began to arrive.  My four girls who were bridesmaids, came and grabbed their seat while the rest of the guests started to arrive.  The lady servers start to bring out the meals, it was a fantastic chicken cord on bleu with a salad and mashed potatoes.  But the big event that happened and is very important to me, were the speeches made by the bride, groom, and the best man/maid of honor.  The speeches being said by the maid of honor and the best man are very touching and warms the heart.  They spoke of the ttimes we have had together throughout the years and the impact that the married couple have had on these individuals, with a toast to the couple after they spoke about them.  As I stood to acknowledge all of the fabulous people who had helped us out and are celebrating this important day with us. 

“Thank you very much for coming to our wedding, to celebrate moments we are sharing with you, that is a great milestone in our lives.  We could not have done it without you and are extremely grateful for your support and love.  When we were sad, you lifted our spirits.  When we were indecisive, you pointed us in the right direction, when we were lost, you helped find our designated purpose.  When all hope was gone you brought encouragement and when we needed love you gave it.  I just want to say that when John came into my life, I truly found my purpose, my reason for living.  HE is my light and love.  He has opened my eyes and taught me things no one ever in my life has done.  And I am truly grateful that it is me that is standing before you all as his wife, after this afternoon today! I have loved him unconditionally, desires him with my whole heart and am so happy to be with him for the rest of my life.  He is kind, he is charming and good-looking, never is cross with me and puts up with my silliness.  I am so proud of him and tod be able to call him husband!  Honey, to many years together and lots of love between us and our families!!”  Sarah sat down and her husband whispers to her, “I love you Sarah, you are my everything!!” I smile back at him, the love of my life, my pride and joy and everything I have ever wanted and everything to me.